Sunday, September 19, 2010

Taking up the limelight

"There is no remembrance of men of old,
and even those who are yet to come
will not be remembered
by those who follow"
- Ecclesiastes 1:11.

Today in church, my pastor at Doxa has started a study on Ecclesiastes, a study on wisdom. The way he exampled it was great. I, personally, have become sick of the 1-2-3 step formulas to have a better relationship with everyone and their mom. Formulas don't work with a relationship or even with people. They can't possibly factor in human beings into their equations. Formulas and equations work great with numbers and reactions. But not with people, not in life. We're not that simple. And we're not that predictable. (Actually, thinking about it, many people are. :)

One of the things Jimmy said today opened my eyes. Have you ever been sitting with friends and they ask you what you want to be remembered for? What do you say? Usually, it takes me awhile to come up with something. Not because I don't have dreams or work to fulfill them, but because who am I to be remembered. Sure, my friends, family, and any else who'd apply would miss me if I died, but after these people died no one will carry on my name. And why should they? I think we have this weird obsession with how important we are. We elevate ourselves to some big position. We expect people to want to remember us or to be impacted by what we do. Many times we overlook other people because we're more important. I'm not saying to stop dreaming of ending sex trafficking or hungry. Definitely, go at it. Attack those monsters, but don't overlook other people while you do it.

Whenever I'm in the middle of these types of conversations, I always have the urge to say, "I don't care. I'll be with Jesus. Celebrating Him. As long as Christ is glorified by one thing I did, my name doesn't have to be known." But, I never have the courage to say it. Maybe because I don't want the crazed looks or the questions that follow. I wouldn't know how to answer them. I'm still trying to figure what I believe in this matter.

Think back to your ancestors. What's the name of your great grandparents? I don't even known mine. I know my family, especially my grandma Dukeman and my aunts, talk about them often. But I don't know them. It'll be that way with us someday. We're easily forgotten people. But that doesn't stop us from hoping we'll get the one line in the history book.

Honestly, my legacy doesn't matter. In the whole scheme of things, I'll just be another rotting corpse in the ground. I don't want to be remembered or praised.

Whatever I do, may it be for the glory of God. I'd rather have God glorified 30 more years than me taking up the limelight.

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